View Full Version : Preparing for a zombie apocalypse.

08-25-2011, 04:32 PM
I usually ride my bike to work, but on Tuesday, it happened to be in the shop, so I drove. Of course traffic was a mess, and it took me forever to get home. Although Iím a member of CaBi, those bikes were all taken, so I couldnít leave my car and ride home.

While I was driving, I began thinking about the inevitable zombie apocalypse. Cars would initially be deathtraps, with everyone caught in traffic becoming sitting ducks for the hordes of brain-eaters. Eventually, gas would become a scarce resource, so it wouldnít be smart to rely on cars.

A bicycle, however, would be perfect for survival. My question for you is, what would you look for in a bike (and related accessories) to help you escape from the blood-thirsty legions of undead?

Hereís what Iíve come up with so far:

Mountain bike: able to go anywhere, do anything, and will make riding easier when the roads start deteriorating due to lack of maintenance.
Durable: Slam into a wall? No biggie. Drop off a retaining wall while being chased? Whatever. Canít have any of this ďoh no, I clipped a rock, by derailleur hanger is bent, no more riding for me.Ē
Low maintenance: While it will be possible to loot supplies from stores for a while, specifics are going to be hard to come by. The bike would need to be able to take a major beating and live with dirt and grime without problem. The only thing that it should need is for the chain to be wiped down and re-lubed occasionally.
Folding: While cars wonít be able to be relied on early on, and after gas becomes scarce, there will be occasions where abandoned cars can be commandeered when needed. Who knows what kind of cars will be available, but likely it wonít be big enough for you, your ragged companions, and your bikes. Youíll need them again when the gas runs out, so being able to fold them and throw them in the trunk is essential.

Donít forget accessories and other parts:

Pannier rack: You gotta carry food and supplies. I would probably look at something with a quick connect system, like Topeakís QR racks. That would make it easy to load and unload your gear quickly.
Handlebar bag: You can never have enough space. Again, something with a quick connect.
Frame pump: Obvious. I like the Topeak Morph pumps, which convert into mini floor pumps.

What other things do you think are necessary? What bike would you choose?

Tim Kelley
08-25-2011, 05:13 PM
This web comic is highly appropriate for this thread:


08-25-2011, 05:44 PM
What's useful for zombie attacks, also useful for DC area commuting.

08-26-2011, 05:42 PM
One potential idea would be a tandem mountain, for if you find a haggard survivor and need to get them out of there. But this kind of altruism would likely be your downfall in the end.

Also worth looking into, mountain tires studded with large nails.